MiSeDuCaTioN # 17: THou Shalt NOT say “OK LANG” when it’s not. (PART 2)

WHAT WOULD YOU DO IF…

…inimbitahan ka ng pinsan mo sa kanila after not seeing her for 10 years, nagsabihan ng mga DIRTY secrets, pinakain, pinagamit ng pc, binigyan ng stateside na sabon, toothpaste, etc. at mga orig cd, niyakap at nagpapicture pa at ininvite ka bumalik uli bago ka umuwi, pag tinatanong mo kung may problema, “OK LNG” daw, tapos magtetext sayo ng ganito?

” INABUSO MO ANG KABAITAN KO!!! KAILANGAN KO PA MAGPAALAM SAYO PAG GAGAMIT AKO NG PC KO!!! PINALABAS MOKO SA SARILI KONG KUWARTO AT NAG-LOCK KA PA!!! KUNWARI NAGBA-BLOG KA.. NAGCHA-CHAT KA LANG PALA….OK NA SANA EH. MAY KONTING SABIT LANG. SA TINGIN MO MAY MATITIRA PAKONG RESPETO SAYO? “

Hephep! teka lang.. bago ka mag-react, Here’s more:

” HINDI KA NAMAN DAW ININVITE NI ATE ARIANA PUMUNTA DITO EH…. KASO WALA NA SIYANG MAGAWA.”

Hindi pa ko nakaka-recover sa text na to ng dumating pa tong isa:

” BILANG KO KASI YUNG GAMOT KO… 7 PCS. BUTI NA LANG NAGTIRA KA PA SAKIN. ANYWAY ALLERGY TABLET LANG NAMAN YUN EH. SINABI KO NA RIN KINA MAMA AT PAPA ( sa States. ) LAHAT NG ACTIVITIES MO MULA NG DUMATING KA DITO.”

when this happened to you…What would you do?

IS THIS  SOME KIND OF BLACKMAIL? coz if it is, then I have never ever felt so CHEATED in my life. It’s like everything she did was a trap!  Did she lured me into getting all of this just to destroy my credibility? But .. what’s the purpose behind? SHE IS MY COUSIN, RIGHT? Why would she do it to me? pero ang tanong pa rin,- Para ano’t ginawa nya yun?

a:) Para ba hindi kami makatanggap ng steytsayd package? (Which never happened, and in which my family is very much independent from, since the creation of the world?) -Or

b:) is it her mission to prove that my bigamous father could never ever raise an independent, self- supporting child, most importantly- with DIGNITY?

As I searched for an answer to my cousin’s clueless behavior, I crossed this terrifying word from an online dictionary:

 schizo·phre·nia
Pronunciation: skit-s-fr-n-
Function: noun
: a psychotic disorder characterized by loss of contact with the environment, by noticeable deterioration in the level of functioning in everyday life, and by disintegration of personality expressed as disorder of feeling, thought (as in delusions), perception (as in hallucinations), and behavior — called also dementia

 If its not letter A or B, then it will all sum up to the ONLY REASON that I’m afraid to think of why she’s acting so strange.  AFTER THE TRAUMA AND THE ABUSE AND THE ANGST AND THE SELF ISOLATION AND HER FINAL FATAL CURSE TO HER MOLESTERS, CO-WORKERS, AND THE NEXT DOOR BAKERY BOY WHO GAVE HER A STONE HARD PANDESAL-COULD THIS BE THE POSSIBLE ANSWER?

IS THIS THE POSSIBLE TRUTH WHY SHE ACCUSED ME OF STEALING SOMETHING THAT I DONT REALLY NEED?(for the record, an ALLERGY TABLET?) The TRUTH that most people having this problem could easily deny, and find it so hard to accept. That she is, in fact- not “MENTALLY” HEALTHY?

Irregardless to the least of the possibility that my cousin is mentally disturbed, I could never deny the fact that she is still my cousin. At dahil “PINSAN” ko siya- Nag-sorry ako ifever na na-offend siya nung sinabi kong sa loob ng sampung taong walang humpay kong pagtatrabaho… “HINDI AKO SANAY NANG WALANG GINAGAWA.”

LESSON #1: WAG MAGSASALITA NG GANITO SA ISANG TAONG WALANG TRABAHO AT AYAW MAGTRABAHO.

Nag-SORRY  man ako sa pagiging TACTLESS ko, I NEVER OWE A SINGLE DROP OF APOLOGY FOR THE REST OF HER ACCUSATIONS. I DO NOT FIND MYSELF GUILTY IN ANY OF THOSE CHARGES ANYWAY. How could she say that I abuse her from coming over uninvited, or using her things, using her room, being straightforward, etc, when IN FACT, she’s the one who invited me to come over at the first place and I HAVE ALL HER CONSENT? – Diba nga pag tinatanong ko siya  sa part 1 ng kwento na to, ang sagot niya puro-OK LANG?!!!- remember?

 I proved to her that I did write some posts nung pinayagan niyako magsolo sa kuwarto niya para makapagsulat but I ended parking everything i wrote up in my drafts. In fact, I’m trying to write about this total nightmare  “DREAM VACATION”  ko sa kanila. kaso hindi ko tlga  alam kung bakit hindi ko matapos-tapos….

 NOW I KNOW WHY.  AND I KNOW EXACTLY HOW TO END THE STORY.

She replied:

“SIGE, I-BLOG MO! IFO-FORWARD KO YUNG LINK MO KINA MAMA AT PAPA AT SA LAHAT NG KAMAG-ANAK NATIN!!!- DUN MOKO PAGMUMURAHIN!!! YUN NAMAN ANG GUSTO MO, DIBA?”

…is this another blackmail?

LESSON #2: TEACHERS DON”T SAY BAD WORDS INFRONT OF THE CLASS.

– but the people or “pupils ” reading this and make comments after CAN. 🙂 just so u know, Cuz. I’m not in control of their thoughts. And TEacheR ZappeD cannot take away their right to speak. I don’t know what she’s trying to prove why does she need to threaten me that she would tell it to her parents and to the rest of my father’s side of the family  when she knew I GREW UP BARELY EVEN KNOWING THEM. I COULDN’T EVEN REMEMBER SOME OF THEIR NAMES AND WHAT I MEAN TO THEM. IN FACT, WHEN FOR SOME OF THEM I”M NOT EVEN SURE IF THEY EVER KNEW THAT I EXIST!  

Through GOD’s saving grace, I hope to say this message to the rest of my father’s side of the family  in the most humble way,- NABUHAY PO AKO NANG WALA KAYO.THANK YOU. I dedicate the lyrics on NE-YO’s song: PLS. DONT WORRY BOUT ME, IM FINE to ya’ll. NO hard feelings…. BUT TRUE.  AND I PRAY THAT MAY GOD CONTINUE TO BLESS YOU, WHEREVER  YOU MAY BE.

… AND MAY MY COUSIN GETS THE IMMEDIATE HELP THAT SHE NEEDS BEFORE IT’S TOO LATE.-That is, to see a SHRINK. (PhD.)

Pls. don’t think it’s that easy to write all of this and get HATED & CURSED by my relatives after. It takes a lot of strength to type this message, and I know they might break me off the chain from our family genealogy– but I’m taking the risk, cause INSPITE OF EVERYTHING, I STILL LOVE HER AND I DON”T WANT TO LOSE MY COUSIN JUST LIKE THIS.

So just in case you talk to her AND SHE SAID ” OK LANG AKO” ….

 Think again.

…SHE IS NOT.

And why am I writing this? This would lead us to the last lesson in this story that I’m trying so hard to protect and to keep. My-

LESSON #3: – INTEGRITY.

Because my DIGNITY is of more worth.- than just a piece of allergy tablet. 🙂